Two weeks home and the progress is pretty amazing! We are sleeping more now and everything is better with sleep. The sickness has left the Vail home, at least for now. Actually Elena just went to the doctor and we discovered a nasty little ear infection. Who knows how long she has had that because she just doesn't complain. When you live in an orphanage, why complain? It doesn't get you much. Now, she is clearing up and can breathe for the first time in, well, I don't know but she was sick when we saw her in December.
What has changed this week? Well, our little one is learning some signs (more, eat, all done, etc.) and she definitely knows her new name. In fact, she seems to understand a lot of what we say. Also, she likes the dog now! Well, maybe like is a strong word, but she tolerates him and I think we are almost to "like".
She had her first play date and they were SO cute together. In the back of my mind I was super nervous because we were warned by the orphanage that she has to be separated from kids, she is aggressive and a bit violent. I was just waiting for her to sink her teeth into this other sweet little girl, but she did so great! She was so relaxed, gentle and kind. It never ceases to amaze what a different child she is away from her old environment. Is this not a HUGE testament to why children need to be in families?!! And I learned a valuable lesson too. I need not assume the worst of my little girl. She keeps proving us wrong!
Bonding is getting there too. As we get to know her and begin to understand her fears and need for control, we are able to adjust our parenting to help her cope with all the loss she has experienced. We seem to be understanding each other better which leads to more peace in our family. Oh yeah, and did we mention that sleep helps too! This past week Braden got hurt and while I comforted him through the tears, Elena watched. Not long after that we were playing in her room and she got up, went to the wall and slammed her head into the wall. With no tears, she just turned, ran to me and rested her head on my shoulder for a few seconds. Then she got up, went to the wall and did it again. This happened several times before she was finally satisfied. Since then she knows when she gets anything that resembles an "ouch" exactly where to go for comfort. Although the self inflicted injuries are a little weird, its pretty great to watch her figure out this thing called love. Thankfully, there have not been any more injuries of the self-inflicted variety.
I have been reflecting this week on the adoption ban and what this means for thousands of Russian orphans. I look at my daughter and I cannot believe that anyone would turn down the opportunity to love her. And yet, in Russia, she was considered broken and not adoptable. They ran a TV commercial for months in Russia, trying to find anyone to take her. After all, she fits the ideal image. Blond curly hair, blue eyes. Because her mother experienced a difficult life, no Russian would dare take the chance on this little angel. And what would her life be if she stayed in Russia? She would be moved to different orphanages to fit her age until she reached 16 years old. Then life would take a very dark turn for the worst. In fact, life would become so horrific that orphanage life would become preferable. Most young orphan females are picked up by human traffickers soon after being sent to the streets. Most likely, her future would have been short and her last days would have been spent as a victim of the sex trade.
Instead, this little girl has joy written all over her face. Her laugh fills my heart with joy and gratitude and her passion for life humbles me because in 20 months she has been through more than most in a lifetime and she chooses joy.
Also, please pray for my 2 month old nephew, Ben. He is going in for surgery on Thursday morning because his skull plates prematurely fused together. They will be cutting his skull to allow the brain to grow. Thank you!
